My Strange Life
By Amy J. Welch

Chapter 4
Boyfriends in the Closet



One day I came home from school, like I always did, and went straight for the refrigerator. I like to eat Yoplait when I get home, especially the peach flavor. With a banana when we have them. I sit down in front of the TV in the den, which is where my Daddys home office is too, and turn on MTV and have my snack. My Daddy is an aerospace engineer, whatever that is, and hes almost always working. Mostly at his office, but sometimes he travels, and sometimes he can stay home and do whatever it is he does on his computer in the den.

He has like three computers really. One that just does typing and stuff, and another one that he can draw stuff on, even though it really doesnt look much like anything except colored lines, and another one that we can use for the internet and playing Sims on, and that one has a real fancy camera for video conferencing. My Daddy does that a lot when hes at home. I use the camera too, sometimes, when nobody else is at home. Videoconferencing is fun, except I call it webcamming, and its a great way to meet interesting people from all over the world.

Some people I talk to on the Internet like me so much they want me to come visit them. They say theyll even send me airplane tickets, if I want. When I was twelve, I asked my Daddy if I could go to London and meet a nice man who always pointed his camera at his penis for some strange reason. My Daddy got kind of mad then and he grounded me from using the computer for a week and then made me swear Id never talk to that man again. So I didnt, since theres so many other people to talk with anyway.

Oops, Im rambling on againSorry.

On this particular day, I grabbed my yogurt and a banana and went into the den as usual. Daddy was in there though, so I couldnt really watch MTV loud like I wanted to. I just sat down in the big leather chair next to his desk where he was sitting. I like to sit in that chair sideways, with my legs over one arm and my back against the other, so my skirt naturally slides way up around my hips, but I dont mind. I took off my silly little blue tie that we have to wear at the Virgin Marys Academy and undid the top two buttons of my blouse, just to the white lace of my bra, because its more comfortable like that.

I sat there, wriggling my toes in their little white ankle socks with lace around the tops, you know. And I was dipping the banana into the yogurt so it gets all creamy white with just a little bit of that light golden peachy stuff on it. I didnt bite it or anything though, mostly I just like licking it off. I eat all the yogurt first, see? And then I eat the banana afterwards. Dont ask me why, I just like to do it that way, I guess.

But sometimes I put the banana in my mouth and make a tight little O with my lips and pull the banana out, so the gooey yogurt slides off on my tongue. And sometimes I like to see how far in my mouth I can push the banana without breaking it, pushing it until it touches the back of my mouth and then pulling it slowly back out again. Once in awhile, if the banana is nice and firm and curved just right, I can open my throat like Im swallowing and the tip of that banana goes right into my open throat. I could probably swallow the whole thing! If I really wanted to, I mean.

Thats what I was doing while my Daddy was teleconferencing with some people from MIT who seemed to be disagreeing with some people from CIT. But my Daddy wasnt listening to them, he was watching me, until somebody asked him something and then he seemed to wake up and see me looking at him. He turned around, his face turning red, and told those people on his computer that hed rerun some data and get back to them. They all hung up pretty soon after that and I turned on MTV with the remote, but not too loud, and scraped the last bit of yogurt from the bottom of the cup with the banana. But I just licked it off that time, it was getting kind of soft and I was afraid if I tried to put it in my throat it would break off and choke me.

Iuh, I wish you wouldnt do that, Amy, Daddy said. It makes it hard to, uhconcentrate.

I looked at him with my big blue eyes as I licked the banana from the bottom all the way to the top, feeling it curve beneath the tip of my pink tongue, coated a little white from the yogurt.

Do what Daddy? I smiled and licked my lips.

UhhhhNever mind, Amy. He looked at my bare legs hanging over the chair and the little flimsy piece of white nylon panty that was showing where my plaid skirt had ridden up too high. Would you get me some coffee, dear? I think theres some left in the pot.

I frowned at him. You shouldnt be drinking coffee in the afternoon, Daddy. How will you be able to sleep tonight?

I dont know, Amy, he said under his breath. Then he said louder, Just dont tell your mom.

Oh, Id never tell on you, Daddy! I smiled and stuck the banana between my lips, holding it there with just my mouth as I pushed myself off the chair. I took the banana out of my mouth and looked at him. I love bananas! I giggled and then I kissed it right on the tip.

I gave him a scrunch of my nose and went to get his cup off his desk, the one that says, Worlds Sexiest Daddy! on it and Id given it to him for Fathers Day when I was thirteen. I had to lean way over to reach it too, so my partially unbuttoned blouse fell open and Daddy could look right down it and see my small boobs hanging against my bra. Hes so cute when his face turns all red like that! And then I went off smiling to get his coffee, hearing Daddys chair squeaking as he shifted around and I gave my butt an extra wiggle because I knew he was looking.

While I was getting the coffee and eating my banana and looking through the mail, the phone rang. Daddy said hed answer it, which was a good thing because my mouth was full. He was talking to someone when I came back and put his coffee cup on his desk. I stood there, kinda twisting on my hips and listening to him talk.

For when? Daddy pulled out his leather organizer, which looks like a fancy notebook with all kinds of tabs and notes and zippers and stuff. He flipped it open to the calendar, first to the month and then he frowned, turning to the week. Got it

Hmmm I sighed, wondering what was going on. I hated it when my Daddy had to go on business trips.

Look, my wife will be busy that day and she Daddy listened some more.

February? I asked, but not really. Daddy looked pretty busy.

Yeah, I know howYes, I understandAppointments are hard to come byBut my wife usually takes care of this and My Daddy started writing on February the 14th, Amy 1:15pmvon he stopped writing, See mine? How do you spell that? he asked. Then he finished writing Siemein on his calendar.

Doctor von Siemein? I blinked at him.

Daddy didnt seem to notice as he listened to whoever he was talking to. RightYes, thank youSee you then. Bye. He hung up the phone and looked at me, but I already knew what it was about.

Well, it seems you have a doctors appointment next week with Dr. von Siemein. He tapped his pen thoughtfully on his organizer. Thats your, uhhes your

Gynecologist, Daddy, I said for him. But I thought my appointment was on the 21st, not the I looked at his calendar, the 14thDaddy! Thats Valentines Day!

I didnt want to go to the doctor on Valentines Day! We were having a party at school that day. I was going to spend a little time with my favorite Valentines, Jeff and Brad that day! And Uncle Max said he had a special present for me from Spunky! And Uncle Seymour had already told me that he wanted to make a special movie and hed even bought me some special Valentines clothes to wear for it! And Id promised Jenny that Id go with her to the dance that night and we were both looking forward to that since my mother, Miss Squires, and Miss Holsum were all going to be chaperones! I was way, waaaaay too busy that day for a stupid doctors appointment!

Im sorry, Amy. I guess Dr. von Siemein had to change his vacation schedule because the people he time shares a condo with on some beach in Hawaii had to change their plans because their accountant lost $300,000 at the race track that he had embezzled from them and they have to appear before a grand jury about their tax returns for the last five years Daddy shrugged. Or something like that. Whatever the reason, your appointment got moved up a week, kiddo.

B-But mothers going to be at the Little Sisters Charity Auction that day so I blinked rapidly.

Id finally realized that Daddy would be taking me to see my gynecologist. That wouldnt be so bad, would it? Wed get to spend some time together, maybe even some quality time if I could convince him to hold my hand during the pelvic exam, and Id rather spend time with him than anyone!

Right. So, uhIll be taking you and, uh He looked a little embarrassed about it as most men would be. Maybe we could have lunch together and afterwards, if you wanted to. Maybe do a little shopping?

You wanna take me shopping, Daddy? I giggled and he was just looking for a way to make someone elses mistake up to me. What a great Daddy! I love him so much!

Youre getting to be a, uh, wellYoure growing up, Amy, and maybe its time you had some, uhGrown-up clothes or jewelry orSomething.

Really, Daddy? I almost squealed because Id seen a gold and diamond tennis bracelet at Upton Jewelers that I was just aching for! And clothesOh my!

I do admit I am spoiled, by my Daddy much more than my mother, but by a lot of other people too. So maybe Im not the most realistic person in the world when it comes to how much something costs or is worth, but honestlyWho can put a price on happiness? Huh? Not my Daddy for sure, at least not my happiness, and I licked my lips and gave him some serious blue eyes, sort of arching my back because it felt like my boobs were trying to grow extra hard just then.

He was smiling, seeing his words had the desired effect, and I knew later he would wonder exactly what it was that hed promised and maybe worry just a little that hed overdone it. But in the end hed decide he hadnt, because he loved me soooo much! I got tired of just posing and decided to jump on him, wrapping my arms around Daddys strong neck and my legs around his waist, like I was five instead of fifteen, and I could feel something firm and lumpy rubbing against the taut panel of my panties as I kissed his face.

Youre the best Daddy in the whole wide world! I cooed as he laughed and disentangled me so that I slipped down to sit on the carpet at his feet, looking up at him. Except you dont hug so good! I pouted playfully and he picked me up so I was standing again. Were gonna have to work on that, Daddy!

What? Daddy chuckled. I hug great and you know it! I just dont want to spoil you for other men!

I kissed his cheek, standing on my tiptoes and accidentally pressing my hand to bulge in his trousers. You already have, Daddy, I whispered softly and then ran off giggling while he swatted empty air where my butt had been.

I went upstairs to take a long hot bath and try to imagine what Daddy might buy me for Valentines Day.

+++ 

That day, February 14th, started just like any other. Except that we didnt really have classes that morning. Valentines Day is a big deal at the Virgin Marys and almost everyone was involved with decorating the cafeteria for the party we were having in the afternoon. Or especially decorating the gym for the big Valentines Day Dance we were gonna have. It made me a little sad because my heart really wasnt in it. I was helping in the cafeteria, but I knew my Daddy was coming to pick me up at eleven oclock for lunch, followed by my doctors appointment.

Still though, its hard to be too sad on Valentines Day. I gave Jenny a card that was like a music box. When she opened it, the card started playing the love theme from Romeo and Juliet. It was really nice and she liked it a lot. We sat in the chapel because it was the quietest place in school. Everyone else being busy elsewhere, and besides, hardly anyone came into the chapel on a normal day anyway. I didnt even know why they had one, since there was a big old church just up the block.

Jenny gave me a card too and a present about half the size of a shoebox. I smiled at her and giggled as I ripped the paper wrapping off. Inside was a life-size chocolate cock about eight inches long. It looked totally real with veins and everything! The box it was in even promised a creamy filling, delicious and salty and perfect for the girl who has everything!

Where did you get this? I laughed.

Jenny was smiling at me. I got it at the Lexington Bookstore downtown. I had to wrap it before my mom saw it, she giggled. And I put it in the freezer, so its probably still hard.

What were you doing in Lexington Books?

That was the only adult bookstore in town. Id been in there once, just to check it out, but the clerk had kicked me out when he found me giving a guy a blowjob in one of the movie booths. Only because he was a fag though, the guy who used to work there before always let me do it so long as I sucked him off first. Hed been kinda fat and hairy and he smelled like Taco Bell, but I didnt mind. It was kind of a sleazy place anyway so he fit right in.

I went there with Jessie the other night. She wanted me to pick out a dildo, Jenny explained and Jessie is my mother, of course. We got this big purple double-headed King Dong thing. Its awesome! You should come over and try it with me sometime.

I bet! I shook my head and rolled my eyes at her.

Anyway, I saw this choco-cock thing and I figured youd like it, she kissed me on the cheek. Cause youre so sweet anyways!

I thought it was cute, but I was surprised that shed gotten so naughty now that she was with my mother. Before, Jenny was kind of low key about her sexuality, even with me, but shed changed, as I suppose everyone does. Now the fifteen year old girl really embraced who and what she was. She hadnt told her parents yet that she was gay, but she said she thought they already suspected anyway.

Of course that meant they were suspicious of me, which made Jenny happy because she was mostly sleeping with Jessica, my mother. Only rarely did Jenny and I do much more than make out once in awhile, you know, like when we went to the mall to see a movie. We really were more like sisters now, than lovers, and that made me sad sometimes, but I thought that would probably be a deeper and longer lasting kind of love too, so maybe it was a good thing. Incest is kinda cool anyway.

She also told me that my mother was planning on talking to me about Jenny one of these days, because she thought I was figuring out what was going on. Mother still didnt know that I knew everything. Id seen her having sex with Jenny and Miss Squires some five months earlier, and Jenny told me everything anyway. We never had secrets, Jenny and I. Plus it made it a lot easier for Jenny to get together with my mother if I was eager and ready to make a convenient excuse to leave them alone together.

I didnt mind though because my mother was so much happier now, I thought, and Jenny was too. I loved them both. And I spent a lot more time with Daddy, since Mother was occupied with my best friend. I felt guilty sometimes, wondering how Id gotten involved with helping my mother cheat on Daddy, but truthfully, I liked the way it made excuses for my own behavior. Probably Daddy knew anyway though, because he wasnt dumbor blindand seeing Mother dressed to kill for a Tupperware party didnt fool him one bit. He just didnt know she was fucking her daughters best friend.

Life sure gets complicated, doesnt it?

But then I was juggling other relationships too, serious ones, or at least someone thought they were serious. Brad and Jeff were waiting for me in the closet in the art room. They were a couple of seniors who both said they loved me. Not like little teenage love either, but like serious I want to marry you and live with you forever and put thirty babies in your belly love.

I wasnt sure I loved anyone like that, except maybe Daddy. I thought sometimes if Mother ran off to San Francisco with Jenny and opened up a nipple piercing parlor like they talked about, then I could marry Daddy! But my mind went crazy if I thought about that too much, for a variety of reasons, not the least of which was that hed legally adopted me when I was four years old, so I really was his daughter and everything. But who would know if we moved someplace cool like Las Vegas? I could be a showgirl and Daddy could be a dealer andMaybe that wasnt the best idea, but neither was marrying Brad and Jeff, since wed have to live in Utah probably.

Interlude: Thinking about Brad and Jeff =====>

SoBrad is smart and kind of cute, almost pretty really, like he would make a better girl than a boy. Not too tall, slight of build with soft curling blonde hair and blue eyes behind the little round glasses he wears sometimes, when he doesnt wear his contacts, and not really hip, you know? Hes a nerd. Brad never gets into trouble and hes pretty shy until he knows youre his friend. Hes just a really a nice guy all around.

Hed be a very good husband, especially since hes going to Boston College next year and will probably graduate at the top of his class and get a good job and take care of his family the way my Daddy does. In fact, Daddy likes him a lot. Not only because hes smart and mature for his age, but also because he blushes like crazy if Daddy starts talking to him about sex. Its plainly obvious that Brads never done anything more than kiss me goodnight and Daddy likes that a lot.

But thats not entirely true. Ive never had sex with Brad. Ive never given him a blowjob, or even a handjob. Ive never even let him feel my boobs, except through my clothes. Because after talking more and more with my friend Tama, Id come to realize a girl should be pure, at least with her husband. Id decided that Id never sleep with any man that I might end up marrying. Id save it for our wedding night and then make him the happiest, luckiest man in the whole world! Of course, I really wasnt planning on marrying Brad, I thought of it more as practice.

But that doesnt mean I dont need sex! I do need sex and a lot of it! Luckily for me, Brad is a special kind of man who understands that. He knows Im not giving any sex to him because hes so special and I love him, kinda. He knows hes not like those other guys. So he doesnt mind if I have sex, just to satisfy my natural needs, because it isnt making love, its justsex.

I even let him watch sometimes, because I know Brad has needs too, but if he ever cheated on me? Id never talk to him again. I told him that too. How I just couldnt bear the thought of my brand new husband putting his penis inside me if I knew it had been in some other womans pussy first, even like once, ten years before wed even met, you know? I was gonna marry a virgin and Brad knew it!

All the same though, Brad had tried to talk to me about it once, asking me how it was different if I was letting some other guy put his cock inside me. I asked him why he wanted to marry me then? I mean, I was still in 10th grade and Id had a lot of hot pipe laid up my hungry hole, to put it delicately. So why would Brad marry a cock hungry slut like me, knowing Id been fucked by a bunch of other guys, some of them his best friends to boot, and he just told me, I dont care, Amy. I love you!

I told him that was how it was different  I did care! I wasnt going to marry a man with a cock he couldnt control and Brad couldnt argue with that logic!

The other thing that makes Brad so special to me is that he really knows how to take care of me. Not just in the little ordinary ways, but in the big ways tooLike cleaning out my pussy after Ive been fucked. A lot of guys, most guys probably, wouldnt do that for a girl, even a girl they loved and wanted to marry. But Brad does it for me all the time.

He complained the first time, when my little pussy was just way too full of man cream, but none of it was his, of course. Brad told me he didnt want me to think he was gay or something. So I asked him if he was gay and he said no, of course he wasnt. So that settled that! I pushed him back, pulled my panties down, and sat right on his pretty face. He choked a little, gagged a bit that first time, but he scooped all that gooey mess out of me with his tongue and even swallowed it for me! Thats how special Brad is.

But, like I said before, I dont seriously think Ill marry Brad, no matter what he does for me. I dont think Id want a guy who thinks about marrying a fifteen year old girl, for one thing. And to tell the truth, its hard to imagine having children with a guy who sucks other mens cum out of my pussy. I tell him its sexy, and it is, but thats kind of a boyfriend thing, not a husband thing. Not even a boyfriend thing, actually, just a boy friend thing, you know? Like two separate words.

SoNo, I think well just be good friends and thats all. But dont tell Brad I said that, its a lot more fun this way and I spent way too much time training him!

Jeff, on the other hand, is a nice guy too, sometimes. But hes on the St. Josephs football team and likes to work his body instead of his brain. Hes really big, like 65 tall and weighs twice as much as me, easy. Maybe even three times as much, thats how big Jeff is, and probably because he takes after his dad, but I dont like his dad very much. He looks at me like a bear looking at a picnic basket. And hes always saying dumb jokes to me like You might be Jeffs tight end, but after I get done with ya, youll be a wide receiver! and then he chuckles and winks at Jeffs mom, who never says anything at all.

Jeffs one of the linebacker guys or whatever theyre called, and hes going to Oklahoma for college, although I dont know why anyone would want to go there. But theyre paying for his tuition and Jeff and his dad are very proud of that. He said he could have gone to any school he wanted, but thinks hell get drafted someday if he plays there. But I dont know what football has to do with being drafted. He could just go see the army recruiter that comes around school sometimes, it would be a lot easier.

Im definitely not going to marry Jeff, even though he talks like were already standing in the church. He asks me what names I like for kids. He said if we have a boy hes going to be Vince and if its a girl, wellhe says he doesnt really care, but shell probably be Vince too. And then he asks me if Id rather live in Dallas or Green Bay, even though I dont know where on Gods green earth Green Bay is!

And when he takes me out and Daddy talks to him downstairs, Jeff chuckles a lot and calls Daddy Coach. Like hell say, Dont worry coach, when its 4th and inches were going for it! and then hell see me coming down the stairs and hell say Hows my little tight end tonight? and wink at Daddy and say, I cant wait to put it through the uprights, Coach! And I have to grab his arm and get him out of there before Daddy can get the gun out of his closet.

Another reason I wont marry Jeff is because he fucks the sweet bejeezus out of me. Jeff has the biggest cock in school, bar none. Its like the Dominator, a big strap on that Miss Squires keeps in her desk, except its not black and its definitely not fake! Jeff always shoots like gallons of jism from his big hairy balls. Its beautiful and every time I see that massive slab of man meat my heart does a little dance, and every time I touch that drooling one-eyed cunt buster I get tingly all over. I worship Jeffs prick like it was some pagan god come down from the mountain to demand a virgin sacrifice, and since he makes me feel like a virgin all over again, I sacrifice my horny little pussy to it every chance I get.

I just wish it wasnt attached to Jeff, you know?

The funny thing though, is that since Brad and Jeff are so different, and they both want to marry me someday and have nothing else in common at all, I make them at least pretend like theyre friends. Ill only fuck Jeff if Brad is with us, watching, and Ill only go out with Brad if we pick up Jeff. This wasnt an easy thing to arrange, as you can probably imagine, and it makes for some real headaches at times! Mostly with Brad since he doesnt get to cum, he just cleans me up afterwards while Jeff laughs at him, but things have a tendency to work out. As Father Albion says in biology class, Nature seeks equilibrium. I didnt really understand that until I started dating Brad and Jeff.

Note: I pulled all that from my diary, paraphrasing in places, fixing and making sense of scrawled thoughts I had at the time, so Ill hope youll have forgiven the tense. Thats an English Major joke by the author whos making up my life as she goes and getting tired of proofing this over and over. I feel sorry for her sometimes. Anyway, the past becomes the present when youre daydreaming and well get back to Brad and Jeff another time, I hopeI havent decided if that particular joke is worth the three or four thousand words it will take to write it. rr 2004

OhIm editing again and I must confess that I have my graduate degrees in anthropology now, so who cares about tense? Its none of my business! Bad pun, I know. rr 2009

End of the interlude =====> 

Back to where I was, kissing Jenny softly on the lips and thanking her for the card and the big hard chocolate cock shed given me. I started telling her that I needed to run and promising that mother and I would pick her up on our way to the dance that night, but she stopped me.

I have another present for you too, Amy. Jenny was smiling a little mischievously so that she got these little dimples that youd hardly notice, unless you wanted to notice everything about her. She lifted her eyebrows and gave her dark eyes a little roll, like wasnt she the cats meow.

Really? I asked.

Yeah, really. But its not here; Ill give it to you at the dance tonight, she laughed at my confusion. I wasnt going to say anything but I just couldnt wait!

She was almost rubbing her hands together with unabashed excitement. Jenny can be like that though. Shes the kind of person who gives you your birthday present a week early, right after she wrapped it, because giving a gift to you is even more fun for her than getting one is for you.

What is it? I couldnt think of anything she might have gotten me for Valentines Day that would have her that wound up.

Nope! she laughed again. Im not telling but youll beHmmmSurprised! 

Im already surprised, you peanut head! I laughed too. See ya later, Jenny.

I kissed her again, kinda more deeply this time and Jenny sucked my tongue like the exotic sexy lesbian she was born to be. And then I walked out of the chapel while she sat and opened her card again so the soft music played. It almost seemed kind of sad. Like lonely, you know? But I knew Jenny wasnt feeling any of that and thats what made her special. She was going to be my best friend forever!

It was almost time for Daddy to get me, so I didnt have time to make my rendezvous with Brad and Jeff, I could only hope theyd find something to entertain themselves with while they waited for me in that closet. The thought made me giggle a bit and Im sure you can figure out why.

Id gotten a bunch of Valentine cards that day. People just kind of dropped them through the air slots in the lockers, like they were a thousand tall, skinny yellow mailboxes. Or they kept them until they saw you around and gave them to you personally. I guess it kind of depended on how close you were with them. Like I gave Jenny her card, because she was special to me, likewise I wanted to give Tama Vigit hers. I didnt think her parents would let her come to the dance that night and I didnt want to wait until the day after Valentines, especially since it was her first one. At least I dont think theres a Valentines Day in India, but maybe I could be wrong.

It had been awhile since wed spoken, even though we still sat next to each other in biology and she still let me copy off her, but it wasnt the same. It was like she was a long ways away. Id seen her briefly when I went to her house to have sex with her brother, Raji. Tama had let me in, but seemed very reluctant and I didnt know if it was because Id kissed her a few weeks earlier in the public library, or because she knew that her brother was paying me forty dollars to fuck me. Either way, it was kind of awkward and we didnt say much more than Hi. Even though I think we both wanted to. I really liked Tama a lot and I missed her very much.

So, I was looking for her and luckily I found her.

Hi Tama! Happy Valentines Day, I said, smiling as she stood outside the admin office with her jacket folded on top of the book bag at her feet. What are you doing?

She smiled at me, but it was kind of reserved, almost shy.

Hi, Amy. Im waiting for my mother to pick me up. She looked out the big windows into the parking lot as though her mom might already be there.

Youre not going to the party? I asked her, opening my own bag and taking out a book and an envelope.

They were bound together with a ribbon so that the cover of the book was hidden. Id used a red silk ribbon and tied the elaborate bow myself, learning how to do it from a Japanese book of knots. It looked pretty neat, like a blooming rose, but just a little pull on the end and it would all come apart. Id also written her name with a calligraphy pen and it looked almost perfect. Id practiced it for like an hour before Id tried it for real, and then Id ruined two envelopes before I got it right. I was glad Id swiped three extras when I bought the card, but mostly I was glad she only had four letters in her name.

No, my mother thinks I will become too she hesitated, looking for the right word. Liberal. I will become too liberal if I am socializing too much with boys.

I wasnt sure what that meant exactly, but I got the general idea. Her mother didnt want her to be like me.

Oh, I nodded. Well, I have something for you. Its a book. I handed it to her, kind of hoping shed ohhh and ahhh over my fancy ribbon and calligraphy, but she just took it and looked at the spine.

Delta of Venus? She looked at me. Is it a science book?

I laughed at her. UhNo, Tama. Maybe you should hide it from your mom. Its pretty liberal. I was smiling as I only half-jokingly said it. 

She was peeking at the cover, pulling the envelope carefully outward by the corner and I kind of gritted my teeth, wondering how Tama would react. It was a nostalgic photograph from like 1930, showing two women in lingerie sitting together with their arms and legs entwined, looking like they were going to swap some serious lipstick. But right then her mom pulled into the parking lot and Tama stopped trying to peek. She knelt and put her present in her bag, slipped on her jacket, and walked towards the doors. She turned and looked at me for a moment and smiled and then left without saying anything. I said goodbye, but only in my head.

I dont know exactly when or why Id become infatuated with Tama, but I knew it was true. Id been thinking of her constantly since that night in the library. It reawakened emotions I hadnt felt since Jenny and I had first become friends and then realized we were going to be something more. Those feelings for Jenny had never gone away, but only the excitement perhaps, the thrill of something new and special, as though time had eroded the sharp peaks, but could do nothing against the firmament beneath. And now there was Tama who filled my heart and thoughts until I almost wept with the fear that I should burst. I ached watching her get into the car and drive away, feeling the sudden consciousness of my unrequited love overwhelming me, the awareness, the awful knowing that she didnt reciprocate my affection.

If Hell is the absence of Heaven, of knowing that youre denied Grace, then I was truly damned and waxing poetic wasnt going to help, I decided, Valentines Day or not.

The good thing was that I was going to spend the afternoon with Daddy. While I yearned for Tama, I had an equal if not even greater desire to be with him, in any and every way possible. If Tama lacked the capacity to love me, and such a lack made me somehow diminished, then my Daddy embodied the facilities of restoration. Being with him consumed my fears and drove all melancholy from my heart. He gave me hope that everything would be all right with the world and in that way he was very much like Jenny; my two stalwart protectors against the vagaries of life. You do the best you can and let life take care of itself.

How often Ive wished I were so brave as that.

-=-=-

Daddy picked me up and soon Id forgotten my worries about missing all the Valentines Day stuff that afternoon. He was in a good mood and it was infectious. He works too hard, I think, and taking some time off, even if only a few hours to take his daughter to the doctor, was just what the man needed.

I sat in the front seat of the car while he drove, wishing Id changed my clothes. We were going to have lunch at Trattoria Pascuzzis, an elegant Italian restaurant with a wonderful garden filled with spices and herbs, and the smell of baking sweet bread wafts through the air andmy stomach growledI was hungry. Daddy looked at me and chuckled. 

Almost there, he said and I laughed too and miraculously forgot about Tama for a while.

Lunch passed all too quickly, partly because I wasnt looking forward to seeing Dr. von Siemein again, but also because Daddy and I were having such a good time. I was sitting there pretending I was someone other than his daughter, a mistress perhaps that hed sneak away to visit and spoil when everyday life became too dreary. Id let my blonde hair down, coming it with my fingers mostly, and Id taken off my tie and unbuttoned my blouse a little, relaxing and laughing. I sipped my iced tea like it was the finest French wine and Id stare into Daddys eyes across the table and feel the warmth spreading through me. He made me feel so good that Id have to squeeze my thighs together just to keep from spreading them.

I felt my breasts aching, as if they were trying to grow, and my nipples itched so that I had to press my arms against them when I touched my napkin to my lips. I excused myself and went to the ladies room, taking off my bra and stuffing it into my purse. That felt better, but only a little. I looked in the mirror and could see the hard bumps of my nipples straining against the cotton of my blouse and I undid another button, so my firm young breasts would bounce slightly when I moved. I pulled my panty tight against my pussy, feeling the swell of my hairless mound and the soft parting of my pussy lips as the material split them. My clit burned sweetly and I enjoyed the sensation, wishing it would stay with me forever.

When I returned to our table in the garden I imagined that everyone was watching, knowing that I was the young Mistress of the older gentleman who awaited me. The women would be jealous, green with envy, and the men filled with fleeting images of my body beneath theirs, yielding to their fantasies however dark and cruel and strange, without protest or fear. And then their eyes would clear and glance across the table at companions and share a knowing look, or at their wives or girlfriends and blush with guilt, looking quickly away.

But II would only have eyes for Daddy, and as I sat down I smiled and picked up my tea. He was looking at my breasts, his hand rubbing thoughtfully at his chin and I thought for a moment he might say something, but he didnt.

I wish Id changed clothes, Daddy, I said just to make conversation. I feel kind of silly sitting her in my school uniform.

AhNo, Amy, it looks fine. I dont he looked around and then smiled back at me, I dont think anyone minds very much. 

I pulled at my blouse, pinching it between my breasts and picking at it. I need a new bra, Daddy, I told him, not quite in a whisper.

I, uh, noticed. What happened to the one you were wearing? He picked up his tea and sipped it, blushing slightly.

I took it off. It gets too tight after awhile. You know, it gets really uncomfortable. But this is okay, right? I leaned over the table a little and asked him, You cant see anything, can you?

Daddy looked down to see my blouse falling open as I bent over, the edge of the table pushing, against my ribs. I knew he could see everything and my nipples felt like they were on fire. Uh, no Amy, I cant, uhNo he said finally after a good long moment of staring.

I guess the waiter couldnt see anything either, because after he brought our food he hovered over my shoulder until he finally caught my Daddys dirty look and drifted reluctantly away. I thought it was funny, but Daddy wasnt so sure. He looked like he wanted to say something, but decided against it. There must have really been something important on his mind.

So I said, Why do blondes get to park in handicapped spaces?

I dont know. Why?

Because theyre blonde! Duh! I laughed and combed my fingers through my golden blonde hair and Daddy laughed too.

I suppose youre trying to tell me you want a car for your birthday this year. Daddy always knew what I was thinking, well mostly I thought, squeezing my thighs together and imagining what his cock looked like when it was really hard.

We finished lunch talking and laughing and enjoying ourselves. The food was great and I felt so good afterwards, I didnt even mind that I was missing the Valentines Day party at school. We had to get going to my doctors appointment though and wed kind of lost track of time. Luckily for us, downtown isnt very big so we could walk to Dr. von Siemeins office from the restaurant.

While Daddy waited for the waiter to bring back his credit card, I went to the ladies room to freshen up and put my bra back on. Doctor von Siemein was an old guy and kind of nice, but seemed kind of old fashioned too, you know? Not exactly the kind of man whod approve of a 15-year-old girl walking around braless. When I came out of the restroom the waiter was standing by the door, leaning against the wall.

Hey, he said to me. Whats your name?

I looked down the little hall, but I couldnt see my Daddy. Amy, I said. Whats yours?

Im Todd. Can I call you sometime? He was kind of cute, but I wasnt in the mood for a new boyfriend right then.

You cant afford me, I told him with an apologetic smile. Just then my Daddy looked around the corner at us. My customer is waiting, I have to go.

Your Dad you mean? The guy looked at me, trying to understand.

He just likes me to call him that, I smiled sweetly. Especially in bed.

Holy shit! he said, looking at my Daddy then at me.

Bye Todd. I left him standing there, laughing to myself as I took Daddys arm in mine and put my head against his shoulder as we walked out. He looked at me funny and I let him go. Great lunch Daddy, thank you! 

Uh, youre welcome What did the waiter want? We stood at the corner waiting for the light to change.

It did and we stepped off the curb. Oh, just my phone number, I replied as if that were no big deal, which it wasnt.

Oh, Daddy said. Did you give it to him?

Him? I giggled. No way! I told him I was your Mistress and youd get really mad!

What? Daddy stopped cold and his mouth opened and closed silently.

Im just teasing, Daddy! Jeeez! Lighten up! I laughed and grabbed his hand, tugging him along.

You scare me sometimes, Amy, Daddy shook his head. You really do.



End of 04
